Ethical Sluttery

About four years ago, when I first decided I wanted to live the polyamorous lifestyle, I finally read a fantastic book that had been recommended to me separately by several good friends. The title of that book was The Ethical Slut.

This book was a massive influence on me as I was discovering what polyamory meant to me, and it’s where I got the title for this blog. The book used the word “slut” non-pejoratively, to describe people who love sex with lots of different people.

Some people feel that “ethical slut” is an oxymoron. I disagree. Ethics means treating people well, and being a slut means sleeping with a lot of people. I believe it’s totally possible to do both – not always easy, but it’s definitely possible.

My goal in life is to live as ethically and happily as possible. For me, this means being an ethical slut. It means never sleeping with anyone if there’s any question about their enthusiastic consent. It means treating my partners well, and treating THEIR partners well. It means loving myself and learning every day to be a better person, making choices deliberately instead of being carried along by circumstances. And last, but by no means least, it means delighting in the pleasures of sex with the people I love, without shame or guilt.

I am an ethical slut, and I’d like to share a little slice of my life with you.

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